A 38-year-old man, I’ve simply accomplished my public service internship and am receiving a month-to-month wage of almost VND5 million (US$204).
I used to be born right into a poor household in a province within the Mekong Delta area. Ever since I used to be younger, I disliked learning, which led me to cease attending college after grade eight. Nevertheless, I returned the next yr and accomplished highschool earlier than attending a vocational college. After graduating, I did varied guide jobs, together with working as an ironing employee and a building assistant.
On the age of 32, I made a decision to attend night courses whereas working at a building website in the course of the day. I completed the night courses and bought a college diploma three years later. I then managed to get an workplace job at a garment firm near residence, however it didn’t prove as anticipated. Regardless of my competence, my poor communication expertise led to a brief tenure on the garment firm, prompting me to use for my present public officer place.
Seeing everybody fortunately making ready for the Tet Lunar New Yr earlier this month made me extra conscious of my gloomy future. Not solely is my present wage inadequate to cowl a household’s dwelling bills, however incomes so little on the age of 38 additionally makes me really feel totally ineffective and incompetent. I even have a 75-year-old mom and a sick brother to care for, and my very own well being shouldn’t be so good both.
I’ve considered quitting and discovering a better-paying job, however I dare not as a result of if I fail, it is going to be unattainable for me to start out over. My thoughts is consistently torn between two choices: on one hand, I need to stop and discover a extra financially rewarding job; alternatively, I’m afraid of failing. This confusion has left me harassed, annoyed, and feeling powerless as I method previous age.
Am I a horrible and incompetent man? What ought to I do with my life?