Being fat on a plane is a harrowing experience. You are never more aware of your body than when you are in a metal tube careening through the air while trying to shrink yourself in every way possible. As a fat, occasionally airborne human, I have first-hand experience with this. There is a ton of debate around plus-size flyers and whether they should have to pay for two seats or not, but regardless of where you land on that discussion, the baseline fact is that we all deserve to be treated as humans with kindness.
TikTok influencer, mom, and plus-size passenger Vanessa (@soberspouse) was treated with anything but after boarding a Delta flight from Tampa to NYC. In fact, she spent the entire two-hour flight streaming tears after accidentally reading a text her seatmate sent.
“We’ve taken off, and I can’t stop crying. The man next to me, sends one text, ‘urgh HUGE woman sat next to me’ – I saw because I have eyes, and now I feel like a prisoner for the next two hours,” Vanessa wrote on TikTok.
Her video garnered a bevvy of reactions online, most of which were supportive.
“This happened to me on a flight from Charlotte to NYC,” wrote one follower. “I called him out and said ‘that’s a really nice thing to say about someone!’ He didn’t know what to say and said it was about his friend in the row next to us. I was like ‘oh really because one of those guys is my husband.’ He was so uncomfortable the rest of the flight and I stared at him the whole time we were waiting to get off the plane. I’ve never seen someone so uncomfortable and I’d do it again. While I was super upset about what he said, I kept saying to myself that I am the strongest I have ever been and I’m so proud of that. You should feel good about yourself and try not to let this creep make you feel otherwise!”
“Yea, as a man, trust me he was texting his mom who he still lives with,” quipped another.
“Hi! As a current flight attendant, if something like that ever happens again please let us know,” advised another. “There are certain scenarios when we may not be able to move you, due to being a full flight. But never hesitate to tell one of us. If you don’t feel comfortable telling us, write it in your notes app and hand us your phone!”
A few others admonished her for reading his texts, while some also claimed she should have purchased two seats.
Related: How Southwest’s new policy will impact plus-size travelers
When you need to purchase a second seat
Each airline has its own policies, which are generally a little murky to navigate. Airlines typically expect passengers to fit safely and comfortably in a single seat under these conditions:
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Able to buckle the seatbelt, potentially with an airline-provided seatbelt extender.
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Able to sit with both armrests down, without encroaching on the adjacent seat.
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Not occupying part of the neighboring seat or aisle space.
If a passenger does not meet those criteria, the airlines’ policies generally require an extra seat (or a more spacious class) to ensure safety and comfort for everyone on board. However, some argue that this practice is discriminatory, as there are no policies in place for tall people who inevitably hit the seat in front of them.
Related: Passengers are suing airlines for selling window seats with no windows
Which airlines clearly state their policies?
If you are plus-size and considering flying soon, make sure you check in with your airline on their specific guidelines and protocols.
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Southwest Airlines: Starting January 27, 2026, passengers who “encroach upon the neighboring seat(s)” will be required to buy a second, adjacent seat at the time of booking. If they fail to purchase the seat, the airline has the right to ask them to buy another seat at the airport. If no seat is available, Southwest may rebook the plus-size passenger to another flight with open seats. Refunds for the extra seat are possible but only if certain conditions are met, including that the flight departs with at least one open seat, both tickets are purchased in the same fare class, and the refund request is made within 90 days of travel.
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Delta: The airline offers an “extra seat/personal comfort” policy. Passengers are invited to purchase an extra seat when booking, and Delta also reserves the right to move or rebook passengers who are “encroaching” on a seatmate’s territory.
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United Airlines: United requires passengers who cannot “sit safely and comfortably in a single seat,” including being unable to buckle the seatbelt (even with an extender), unable to keep armrests down, or encroaching on adjacent seat space, to purchase an additional seat.
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Alaska Airlines: Their “customers of size” policy states that anyone needing extra space must purchase an extra ticket. If the flight departs with at least one open seat, the passenger may be refunded for the additional seat.
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American Airlines: This airline requires anyone who needs a seatbelt extender to consider purchasing a second seat. If seating wasn’t arranged and there is an issue mid-flight, flight attendants may move passengers to an area with two seats or, for a fare difference, offer an upgrade. However, American does not generally offer refunds for extra seats.
Whatever their policy is, it doesn’t override your right to be there, take up space, and travel the world.
This story was originally published by TravelHost on Dec 3, 2025, where it first appeared in the Airlines section. Add TravelHost as a Preferred Source by clicking here.